Monday, October 10, 2011

我的Katso生活與信仰生活

我的浸會Katso生活已是二十多年前的事,但似遠還近,回想當年的歲月,不少昔日的片段仍歷歷在目浮現在眼前……

  當年剛踏進大學校園,從未想過加入學生信仰團體,因為當時我仍未受洗成為基督徒。可能是時機未到,雖然當時已慕道了好幾年,但自覺很多疑問仍未解決,故沒有領洗的打算。然而,偶然在校園碰上唯一一位與我入讀浸會的中學同學(後來她成為Katso, 即天主教同學會會長),在她的邀請下,我開始參加Katso的活動,後來更加入幹事會,而就讀社會系加上自己對社會問題的興趣,使我成為了社會事務幹事。

  回想加入Katso成為幹事這決定,也可說是信仰路上的一個里程,因為組織幹事會被前輩同學催逼思考甚麼是「大專基督徒團體」,而這個個人思考和與其他同學討論的過程,的確讓年青的我認真探討和對待這身份,令我反問自己與天主、與大專同學和社會有甚麼關係。這探求對我日後繼續不斷探討基督徒的使命和社會責任不無關係,而基督徒這身份從此成為塑造我個人的重要指引。

  在紜紜的Katso活動中,最令我印象難忘的是籌備和組織探訪深水埗籠屋老人。當時構想舉辦一次較大型的社務活動,讓多些Katso同學參加。當時我曾詢問好些同學的意見,其中一位社會系同學與我分享曾在深水埗一個社區組織做義工,探訪籠屋居民,瞭解該區居民的住屋問題,我覺得這項活動很有意思,在採訪之餘,可親身體驗居民的生活環境和初步認識這問題,於是我開始聯絡和籌備,並向Katso同學宣傳,印象中有不少同學參加。由於當時經驗尚淺,當然有不少未臻完善之處,但這經驗卻令我印象難忘,讓我認識到探討社會問題必須親身體驗和直接接觸有關人士,更令我反思基督徒在面對弱勢社群時的態度和角色,而這反思為我來說更是終身的反思。

  成為Katso社務幹事亦讓我有機會代表浸會Katso出席天主教大專聯會的時事委員會和國際事務委員會,這經驗廣闊了我的信仰視野,讓我初次認識到「與貧窮人站在一起」的信仰意義和梵帝岡第二次大公會議後蓬勃發展的解放神學。參加時委,除了讓我與其他院校的同學一起討論本地和國際的社會時事(如反對大亞灣核電廠的興建、南非種族隔離政策等),以及將有關議題和消息帶回Katso之外,更令我有機會到油痳地避風塘探訪住在艇上的甘浩望神父和宋啟民神父,到改成臨時居所的社區會堂探訪木屋區火災災民,以及聖誕節前夕到臨屋區報佳音等。凡此種種都使我在信仰生活和大專生活中不斷反思和成長,更直接影響到我在社會關懷和正義和平工作的投身,以及透過神學教育和研究推動更多信徒探討社會倫理和實踐教會使命。所以,浸會Katso和大專聯會可說是為我的信仰灌溉培養的地方,在我這段年青尋求理想和人生目標的階段給予我重要的啟迪。

(香港浸會大學天主教同學會(BU KATSO)成立五十週年特刊)

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

柔和輕鬆的擔子

主日聖經分享 2011.07.03

大部份人都希望在辛勞工作之後,有一個可好好休息的地方,有一個感到安全和安居的家。這看似簡單的期望,因著勞動階層的工資偏低、樓價和租金過高、人際關係疏離等因素,對不少人來說卻是可望而不可即。不單只社會政策和文化令人無法營造安居之所,即使在教會內,有時因為人事問題、各人處事作風迥異、各人對信仰和傳福音的不同理解,以致出現不同意見甚至爭拗,因而未能令人感受到教會是一個可令人安息的地方,反而有時會令人感到疲累。

「凡勞苦和負重擔的,你們都到我跟前來,我要使你們安息。你們背起我的軛,跟我學吧! 因為我是良善心謙的:這樣你們必要找到你們靈魂的安息,因為我的軛是柔和的,我的擔子是輕鬆的。」(瑪11:25-30)

耶穌說出以上這番說話的背景,是因著法利賽人為信徒加諸很多不必要的重擔,強調要遵守眾多的猶太律法而忽略了信仰最核心的愛,又重視階級觀念而忽略照顧貧困有需要的人士,欠缺一顆「良善心謙」的心。耶穌因而說出這番話,為那些感到疲倦、勞累和承受重擔的人帶來安慰,讓他們知道他能令為他們提供可休息和安心的地方,而不會令追隨者肩負不勝負荷的擔子。

人們易感疲勞,除了客觀的環境因素外,往往是因為只以一己之力應付所有挑戰;耶穌主動提出幫助和解決方法,就是邀請人在主內休息。耶穌使人得到安息不是叫人停止工作、停止一切活動,而是邀請那些在勞苦工作和承擔責任的人追隨他,包括在體力、腦力、精神和感情上要付出和出力的人士在主內安息。願意接受邀請的就是找到一個理想住處,可以令身心靈和諧整合、發展和得到滿足;即使在工作中,也不覺得是重擔,反而感到輕鬆和柔和,因為他們知道人生目標所在,明白所做的事為誰而作,洞悉所從事的服務不只是為人而是為天主所做。

同樣,今時今日,我們當中不少人都為工作、為家庭、及教會、為社會勞心勞力,有時難免感到疲累,渴望有時間和空間休息。這句經文的確能提醒我們,在哪裡才可真正找到安息之所,什麼才是我們生命中最需要的東西。正如羅馬人書所言,「如果你們隨從肉性生活,必要死亡;然而,如果你們依賴聖神,去致死肉性的妄動,必能生活。」 

筆者在美國義工服務時認識了一位朋友,她在三藩市田德農區為無家者服務了超過二十年。當年她完成神學課程後決心將靈修結合倫理實踐,在富裕的三藩市成立了一機構,為最受篾視的無家者提供服務,關懷因種種因素而無家可歸的人士,與他們傾談、瞭解他們的需要,並提供按摩治療,透過身體接觸為他們的身心給予治療。最近,筆者探訪大病初癒的她,看見她精神翼翼、神采飛揚,再次投入工作,周中做探訪和按摩治療,周末則舉辦工作坊和課程,工作繁重,完全不似曾經患病,這些工作也不是她的重擔。當筆者與她漫步田德農區的街頭,每隔幾分鐘便見她與人揮手問好,並想到她曾分享的靈修經驗,便更深體會到耶穌所說的「我的軛是柔和的,我的擔子是輕鬆的」的固中意義。

Monday, January 31, 2011

願意放下 才可得自由

「他們便請求耶穌離開他們的境界。」(谷5:17)

今日的福音是有關耶穌治好附魔人的故事。我想大部份人未必有被附魔的經驗。然而,大家可曾有過被外來強大力量影響自己的判斷或決定,或感到身不由己的經驗呢?

曾幾何時,一位朋友告訴我,她經常受公司的競爭文化所煩擾,不論是同事間的競爭而引發的人事問題,或公司本身與其他公司的競爭而對職員的表現有不合常理的高要求,以至她要過著「非人」生活,雖未至通宵達旦,但經常工作至晚上是等閒之事。這種外來壓力導致身不由已的感覺維持了好幾年。雖然她有頗高的辦事能力,但最後為了過較「正常」的生活,她只好辭職另謀工作。

最近在報章上看到一篇文章,指香港政府經常標榜香港持續位居「世界經濟自由度指數」榜首,以顯示香港的長期經濟增長速度和繁榮程度。但原來提出這指數的基金會背後的相關價值觀,是高舉自由競爭,降低利得稅,「還富於商」,反對提供醫療福利,維持小政府政策。這種觀點和價值觀值得大力吹捧和提倡嗎?是否造成不健康的生活方式的部份原因?
其實,長期被市場經濟、積極不干預等自由經濟理念洗腦,甚至受新自由主義的不斷追求增長和發展所影響,不少香港人已在不知不覺中接受了這些價值觀。這些外在的強大力量無時無刻在影響著我們的消費決定、品味喜好、讀書選科取態、工作文化、投資方式、與他人的關係等等。往往,即使人們想脫離這種外力過另類生活也不容易,因為社會壓力實在很大。

然而,即使再強大的力量,強如「軍旅」的魔鬼附身勢力,耶穌也可將之驅趕,問題是我們是否願意相信耶穌、追隨耶穌,像他一樣生活和待人──過簡樸生活,以慈愛和憐憫之心待人,並敢於與挑戰不義的有權力者。

「他們便請求耶穌離開他們的境界。」有些人明知耶穌有能力驅除魔鬼,但卻只想維持現狀,因為改變需付出代價,可能要作出犠牲,為免改變,便寧可請耶穌離開,拒他於千里之外。在今日的社會,多少人,包括基督徒,為了維持舒適的生活、財富的累積、物質的享受,而把歷史中的耶穌拒諸門外,而只是追求自己心目中可給予一己物質上的「幸福快樂」生活的耶穌?

真正經驗過耶穌以愛為自己帶來釋放和轉變的人,會明白願意放下一些自己擁有的東西,不管是物質財富、安全感、傲慢心態或權力慾,而讓出更大的心靈空間讓上主居住其中,可以抗衡外來的邪惡力量,重得自由,而且會有出人意表的收獲。雖然要脫離這力量不容易,而且不是即時可做到,但信德定可幫助我們拿出勇氣和力量克服邪惡力量,重新與上主和他人建立關係。

Saturday, January 15, 2011

可曾將人分等級?

法利賽黨的經師看見耶穌與罪人和稅利一起吃飯,就對他的門徒說:「怎麼,他與罪人和稅利一起吃喝?」(谷2:16)

有沒有與人聯群結社,又或被排斥於某些圈子之外的經驗?筆者曾經與目標相近的神學畢業同學組成團體推廣整合式的信仰培育,亦參加過不少推動社會正義和關社的宗教或非宗教組織。然而,筆者亦經驗過因看法與某些宗教人士稍有不同而被他們視為不夠正統。

其實,與志同道合、志趣相投的人走在一起是很自然的事,所以,不少人會成立團體、會社、或黨團,為某些目標而努力,興趣相同者如是,政治理念相近者如是,宗教人士亦如是。然而,若走向極端,以為只有自己所屬的黨派或團體的立場和觀點才是正確、才是標準,又或只有自己所做的事才是最好、最有價值,而其他人所做的不能與之相比,那些與自己不同者是「他者」、是異類,則會形成自以為是、排他、缺乏包容精神,這只反映其目光短淺,就如故事中的法利賽黨的經師一樣。

在當時的猶太社會,法利賽人有一習慣,就是喜歡將人分等級,那些絕對服從法律的就是他們一派,就是正統,否則會被劃分成異類。法利賽人絕少跟後者交往,故不會出現同枱吃飯的情境。因此,當法利賽經師看見耶穌與罪人和稅利一起吃飯時,表現得大為驚訝。

然而,耶穌跟法利賽人的待人態度和價值觀卻大相逕庭。耶穌經常與被遺忘、被排斥、不被關心的人在一起,接納他們,並為他們帶來轉化,亦因此而吸引了大批「不受歡迎人士」作為追隨者,他們包括瞎子、跛子、痲瘋病患者、寡婦、妓女、稅吏等。耶穌與法利賽經師不同之處,正是看到這些才是最需要治愈的人。作為一位帶給人真正和徹底治療的醫師,耶穌既照顧那些肉體上生病的人,亦為那些心靈和精神有所欠缺的人帶來安慰。因此,他不會排斥任何人,即使被視為有罪的人,他會以慈愛和關懷與他們建立關係,並令他們整個人轉向他,得以轉化成為一位整全的人,願意與人分享生命。

反觀今天,無論社會或信仰群體內都充滿排斥和分化,一個政黨內的成員會互相攻擊,不同宗派的基督宗教團體有時會互相敵視,甚至同一宗教的信徒亦因觀點不同而互不相容。筆者看到美國教會的「維護生命」團體與「尊重選擇」團體就是其中一個最大分歧,繼而走向極端。最近,美國一間天主教醫院內,醫生因拯救一位懷孕母親的生命而為她進行墮胎手術,結果這決定不被所屬教區主教的諒解,而醫院被免除其天主教地位,事件令人嘆息!
我們自己又如何體會耶穌的憐愛與恩寵?我們所領受的是否願意與他人分享?還是有時會因著自己的自以為是而排斥其他人,甚至將他人分等級或定罪呢?

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

An everlasting commitment

"I shall maintain my covenant between myself and you, and your descendants after you, generation after generation, as a covenant in perpetuity, to be your God and the God of your descendants after you." (Gen 17:7)

A covenant is a sacred promise between God and His people. A covenant in perpetuity is an everlasting commitment in which God promise to give abundant blessing to Abraham and his descendants.

We, living in the modern world and face changes everyday, know that keeping commitment is uneasy. Being affected by culture and environment, values change, attitudes and perspectives change...all these make keeping promise and commitment difficult. We see so many divorces between couples, so many relationships break up, international alliances change from time to time, business or working partners form and break, even friendship can fade out...However, God is always a faithful God and give us blessings all the time. This covenant and commitment will not change according to time and place.

However, sometimes we may take for granted God's commitment and even not aware His abundant blessing for us. I remember in the first few weeks of this past semester, I was so stressful and anxious with the two courses which require weekly papers and the Latin course which required me to memorize so many new rules and words. At a certain point, I complained to God and had doubt in my study here. Why God sent me here and did not give me enough strength and ability to do good. I worried that I could not write well in my papers. I worked overnight several times in order to submit the short papers in time. However, I did not get the result as expected. After two weeks, I adjusted my study time-table and employ another way to work on my weekly papers. I started making note-cards to learn Latin. Gradually, I saw improvement in my work. Now, the semester is over. When I look back, I see the abundant blessings from God. I aware that the Holy Spirit is helping me and supporting me all through the way. I know that God is always faithful to his commitment; it's me who walk away and do not have enough faith in Him.
After this semester, I affirm more that God is guiding me and give me a direction in my life. I'll continue to try my best to study hard and keep on the track so as to equip myself for my future ministry. When I have doubt again in the future, I'll remember the covenant and blessings that God promise to give us. I will do my part to keep this covenant because a relationship is always both-sided.


Tuesday, December 28, 2010

2010 Year end reflection

Time flies and my third semester at Berkeley finished on Dec 17, 2010. It was a busy and tough semester for me. I took three courses as last year but the workload was much heavier, especially when I have to pick up a new language—Latin. Luckily the professor is very nice and does not give us too much pressure. It is a two-semester course and I have to continue in the next semester. My other two courses, one on “Theology and Ethics,” another on “Faith in Human Rights,” are interesting and inspiring, but with many readings and assignments. Since I tried to cover all the required readings every week and handed in all my assignments on time, I had to study almost seven days a week. Anyway, I get it done and I learnt a lot during the process. The professors of these two courses said I did well. I am especially happy when the professor of the Theology class told me at the very end of the class that I did well on a difficult topic in my final paper. My paper topic is “Jon Sobrino’s Notion of Discipleship – Examining his Understanding of Jesus, God and Human Person.” I also received good comments for my weekly papers. From this, I learnt that one must work hard in order to get reward and cannot depend on luck. I understand better the saying “path may be difficult but will be rewarding” after experiencing this semester.

For my human rights class, the Noble Peace Prize issue and the prosecution of Zhao Lian-hai, the victim of the baby milk issue, inspired me to write a paper on “Human rights in China—Examining the Human Rights Values in the Chinese Confucian Tradition.” Both of these papers allow me to reflect further about doing theology and ethics in my own social context. I really thank God to give me the chance to go through this process and give me enough strength and energy to complete my work. I also thank God to give me encouragement and support through my family, teachers and friends, including yours.


This year, I am still living in the student dormitory on campus. Apart from Americans, some students are international students or visiting scholars, from Korea, Indonesia, Taiwan, Brazil, and Poland. I get acquaintance with some of them and became good friends.

There are also a few students from HK living on various dorms in the campus, mostly from other Christian denominations. We have gatherings from time to time to eat and chat. I learnt more about the protestant churches. It's a relaxing time with fun and we can use Cantonese to chat. We toured around San Francisco and Oakland in the past week when the semester finished.

In the next semester, I will start preparing my comprehensive examination proposal, a step before taking the exam and writing the dissertation. I will not take too many courses. I will just take Latin and a reading course (one to one independent study on special topic to help me preparing the proposal). I may stay here during summer to continue preparing the exam and may go back to HK a bit later. I hope I can get the exam proposal passed by the end of next semester so that I can spend next year working on the three to four examinations. My examinations will include Catholic moral theology with focus on social ethics, Asian contextual theology, Chinese Social Thought with focus on Confucian ethics.

In July, I went to Trent, Italy to attend a conference on theological ethics. It was an eye-opening experience for me and I learnt a lot through listening to various paper presentation on ethics.

In November, I went to Rome to attend the meeting of the Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace. I presented a report on Caritas in Veritate (Pope Benedict’s most recent social teaching document) from the Asian perspective. I have spent several days working on the report and luckily It was well received. There is a new chairperson, Archbishop Turkson, a bishop from Ghana. He is very nice and tried to give everyone a chance to speak during the meeting. I also met a former student of the seminary and is my friend now who is in Rome and had a long chat with her. She is studying her STL (Licentiate of Sacred Theology) in the Gregorian University. Both of us are trying to work hard to meet all the challenges of our studies.

With all the challenges and study workload, I try to keep my life balance and healthy. I have spiritual direction with a Franciscan sister every three to four weeks. She is a great companion in my faith journey and gives me lots of encouragement and support. I attend mass every Tuesday in either the Jesuit school or Franciscan school. I also eat more fruits and vegetables and try to do some stretching exercises every day so as to lessen my shoulder and neck pain.

I understand that those of you who are reading this post must be working very hard and very busy too. Let’s pray for each other. I wish you have a blessed new year!

Monday, December 27, 2010

God take risk for each of us

"What is your opinion? If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hill and go in search of the stray?" (Mt 18:12)

From a human perspective, it doesn't make sense. From the value of a market-oriented society, it doesn't make sense even more. The risk seems too high to take as one may lose the other sheep when the shepherd goes elsewhere to search, and still he may not be able to find that lost one. The opportunity cost is too high! Is it worth? But God has a different point of view. God value each of us and love each of us. God would not abandon us and leave us alone when we are in helpless and uncertainties. Nothing can stop God from searching us when God know us lost the way.

When God found the lost one, he would not confine him in a certain way. God would still give the lost one freedom and he may go astray again. Then, God would take the risk and search for the lost one again. I heard this message from a priest in a mass. What a powerful message! It's so true to us, isn't it? God use his love to move us until we choose to go back to him and choose his house as our home to stay in forever. God won't use force to ask us to return; nor He use law to abide us to follow Him. God use the power of love to touch us so that we turn to Him willingly and respond to His love in a concrete way.

There are so many times that we follow our own way to do whatever we want to do, to treat other people as we like and may hurt them, to seek for pleasure and satisfy our own desire and not caring the need of others. God know all these and give us freedom to do so. But He use various means to remind us that we did wrong and guide us to the right track. Sometimes we aware our fault but sometimes not. God wait for us to return patiently until one day we are touched by His love. God is always ready here to forgive our sins and welcome us back home.

May God grant us this sense of awareness and strength to turn to God and respond to His love!